Tag Archives: transgender

i never wanted to be a boy

… i wanted to be a tomboy (like George in The Famous Five)

GENIUS!


Adding some Eastern Cape LGBTQ voices to the struggle ..

some members of a new activist organisation, incl yours truly. i need a haircut.

my butch friend, mfundi, from the Eastern Cape LGBT Forum. i LOVE this photograph, i’m very proud of it.

my my my gail! mine!

zama, my homo homie from nshongweni in kzn. also ECLGBT Forum.

leigh ann, serious transgender activist

dawn, from the Coalition of African Lesbians

the eastern cape’s the most impoverished, most marginalised province in south africa. there are challenges not only from the westernised version of hate and intolerance that we all know about, but from traditional practice too. sadly, southern african indigenous populations aren’t amongst those ethnic groups who tolerate us trannies and queers. so those are brave faces, not just beautiful ones. and we’re talking grassroots activism. and it’s so worthwhile i can’t even begin to describe just how crucial it is.

seriously.


teach your children well

don’t leave the bullying/intolerance issue to schools – it starts at birth.

tell your kid you’ll love it no matter what – and mean it.

promise to protect and defend your child.

do everything you can to promote your kid’s confidence (not arrogance).

victims get victimised.


how do you solve a problem like sex/gender?

“the milk and sugar are over there sir,” says the woman in the coffee shop.
“can you pull your car forward please mama?” says the guy at the petrol station.

(“mama” isn’t just saying that my gender’s been read as female, it’s also saying i’m old enough to be a mother)

those two interactions took place within minutes of each other and i responded the same to both i.e. i didn’t contribute anything gender-related at all. there were times in my twenties, when if a guy called me sir, i’d respond my calling him ma’am. deadpan, straight faced too. now? i just don’t care.

the queer community often feels fragmented to me. there’s a group wanting gender transcended, the demolition of the binary and the introduction of a fluid approach. and there are those who want to transition instead of transcend and those who just want their biological gender affirmed – those people tend to say that the binary is an irrelevant societal construct – but then they define it and cling to it. i’m not saying that’s wrong, i just don’t understand the logic.

and we all talk, think, shout about gender – but nothing much is said about sex. not sex the act, sex as in male/female. if sex is what you are biologically, frankly it needs challenging too. south africa has a higher-than-global rate of intersex births – are we going to keep forcing all those people to one end or the other of the binary? do we need no sex-categories, or a whole lot more? or just a sliding scale? surely caster semenya is merely the tip of the metaphorical iceberg? are society and its sports teams ever going to allow for more than the binary? or less, even?

why is humanity so very willing to accept new technology, but so fiercely averse to society’s own evolution?

my vote goes to defining the biological sex purely biologically – baby smith has a vagina. baby jones has a penis. baby cooper has a vagina and undescended testes. whatever – but without adding “male” or female” to it. then the babies could grow up, wear whatever the fuck they felt like – and get equal pay for whatever job they did. if the penises consistently beat the vaginas at running, they could create separate leagues, but then what about intersexed people? and the whole binary would probably happen all over again..but at least it would give some respite from gender inequality?

nope, i’ve just talked myself round in a complete circle of historical gender formation.

so what’s the answer?

this game was removed, but ffs …

… and these are the people who bothered to do something about it – major props for that.


top hot butches 2010

 

my t-shirt du jour :) {that's table mountain, cape town}

Okeydokey butch-lovers, here’s your chance to vote for your butch idols. Sinclair Sexsmith hirself is doing another list and there is, of course, some controversy und so weiter. Cool. Go read and nominate.

Rules for nominations:

ALL nominees:

  • Must be active in the public sphere of some sort, or a leader, and well known, in their field. Performers, writers, and activists are particularly easy to point to, but anyone notable in any field is applicable. Yes, this means your girlfriend/boifriend/boyfriend might not qualify. No, having a blog is not necessarily qualification enough.
  • Must have been doing work at some point in the last decade. There are plenty of people we can dig up who are no longer alive, or who were notably butch or visibly masculine women from decades past, but this project is about what’s going on now. Perhaps at some point in the future we’ll tackle Top Hot Butches pre-Stonewall, but for now, let’s focus on who is around now.
  • Can be of any age, though generally we’re talking about folks who are post-puberty, and even more frequently folks who are post-Saturn return, as it sometimes takes quite a bit of time to really know oneself enough to come to an alternative gender identity and expression like these. Age doesn’t matter.
  • Can be of any race, religion, ethnic background, or sexual orientation. That probably goes without saying, but I’ll make it clear anyway.

Inclusions of women, cis or trans:

  • It would be GREAT if they self-identify as some some of masculine of center identity: butch, macha, stud, ag, tomboi, genderqueer, etc.
  • If they do not self-identify this way (or they have a level of fame where they wouldn’t reply to an email asking if they do or not), they will be considered for inclusion based on these things: 1. rejection of traditional femininity, including but not limited to dress, style, and hair; tendency to shop in the men’s department and display a masculine gender expression most of the time; 3. swagger, meaning some sort of masculine energy in their movements; and 4. are out as queer. Some exceptions will be made to the requirement that they are out as queer, such as in the case of Katherine Moennig, where she is very clearly queer but has not made official statements regarding such.

Inclusions of men, cis or trans:

  • Must self-identify as butch. Either you know that they identify as butch, because they’re your friend or you’re aware of their work, or they have made some sort of public statement that says they identify as butch.

Inclusions of genderqueer folks that identify as outside of the binary:

  • Should self-identify as some of masculine of center identity: butch, macha, stud, ag, tomboi, etc., and be interested in being included in a database of butches.

How to nominate:

Email me, or comment on this post, with the following:

  • Name of the person you’re nominating
  • What they do (writer, performer, activist, lawyer, whatever)
  • Link to or attached recent photograph, at least 640×480 (landscape) and better yet, cropped to 700×400
  • Link to their website, Myspace, Twitter, or other web presence for more information about their work

GO VOTE!


my old same-sex sexuality soapbox

lambdaI’ve said it before, but it bears repeating.

If you’d suffer severe consequences on coming out – don’t. There are people who get raped, beaten, murdered for the crime of being out. If you’re very young and afraid – wait. If you’re one of those privileged middle-class types who don’t come out because it’s inconvenient, you’re a coward and a traitor and you have the blood of the victims of hate crimes on your well-manicured hands. Ditto all those celebs whose careers are far more important to them than broader tolerance and the safety of the community.

pink triangleThere are people who are instantly read as sexual/gender outlaws/outcasts – they have the option of adjusting their physical appearance to hide, though it isn’t always a simple matter, or of living out, proud and free. There are those who look “normal” according to conformist society and those people face different issues. Hiding is easy, but what about visibility? They can be out verbally, they can wear/display symbols of queer (or whatever) pride, they can walk hand in hand with their same sex lovers – no doubt there are other options.

black trianglePeople talk about not wanting to make a big deal out of their sexuality, of wanting simply to be treated as “normal” members of society.

And you know what? When they stop killing us for being queer, we’ll have that luxury. Until then – aluta continua.

Thank you for being out.

click to see more symbols


it gets better?

RIP

Raymond Chase, 19, Rhode Island.
Tyler Clementi, 18, New Jersey.
Asher Brown, 13, Texas.
Billy Lucas, 15, Indiana.
Seth Walsh, 13, California
Cody J. Barker, 17, of Shiocton, Wisconsin
Felix Sacco, 17 from Saugus, Massachusetts
Harrison Chase Brown, 15 from Rand, Colorado
Caleb Nolt, 14 in Fort Wayne, IN

Just a few there. A few names of a few dead boys who killed themselves because of the SHIT they took from those around them, for being gay. Just a few Americans. How many more out there, where the root cause hasn’t been revealed, or perhaps not even known? How many more, across this whole wide world of ours? How many who suicided for different reasons, but basically the same reason i.e. society deems them freaks?

Why do children have to die before we start to save them?

Their blood’s on our hands (not purely the queer community either – all of humanity) and it’s staining like Lady Macbeth and what are we doing about it? Sending video postcards to the survivors to tell them it gets better.

Actually, it hasn’t suddenly got worse – it’s always been shitty – it’s just that when it happens in a neat media bite in a media-saturated country, it gets media attention and then we all hear about it. Even people who don’t give a shit about human equality usually.

Dear Outcast Teenagers,

It fucking sucks, that society treats you like a pariah as soon as you don’t conform to the freakin’ norm. It should be valuing you highly and assuming that you have enormous potential. Society, frankly, is wrong.

Maybe you’re sitting somewhere, alone and afraid. Hopefully you’ll find cool people to talk to, who’ll help you while you journey towards being unafraid yourself. Hopefully you won’t get verbally and physically and emotionally battered. I really hope that at the very least, you’ll be safe.

I hope you’ll get angry at some point, rather than just living in fear. I hope you’ll join the struggle for equality and a whole lot less violence. I hope you’ll shake your fist in the faces of homophobes and say you know what, I’m not wrong … you are! Because they are – and anyone who is telling you you’re substandard, inadequate, that what you are is sinful – is talking utter shit.

You really do need to find people you can relate to and talk to. Sometimes you get lucky, but don’t be passive about it – go find someone!

Hang in there. Please.